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the monster and other things that slow me down

21 April 09

so, yeah.  i thought i was better.  now i’m not.  i was, in fact, in so much pain that i went to a med center on sunday night.  supposedly, i should feel better by now.  according to what the doctor found on the x-ray and what he prescribed me, i should have been better for a while now.

i’m not.

and i have to go back to the doctor post-haste.  i have absolutely no faith that this will help, but i can’t figure out how to heal myself on my own, either, and this isn’t just a mild headache or something so… to the doctor i go.

this is what fills my brain, as well as things like the fact that i need to get  our stove fixed already, that i need to return the space heater that already stopped working, that i should have returned my library books on time….

 

but what i really want to fill my head with are other things.  things like processing my trip to africa.  like new discoveries from the books i got from the library tonight.  things like where massi and i will go on our first real vacation ever, for our 5 year anniversary this summer.

and i really want to fill my journal.

but here i am, filled with other thoughts and tasks and struggles… and yes, good, real, important joys as well.

and i’m wondering… how do we redirect to what matters when what distracts us takes over?

how do we refocus?

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One Comment leave one →
  1. rubyslipperlady permalink
    22 April 09 4:19 am

    I’m much better at focusing on such things here than I ever was in the STates. I’m too easily distracted at home. Need to prepare for that in the next two weeks, I guess.

    Praying you are feeling better soon and get somet time to enjoy what you really want.

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